The language of our soul is shaped by dozens of generations of our ancestors, who have co-created the cultural, genetic, evolutionary and systemic profile of your self-understanding. Thus, the thoughts into which you dress your words are dictated by the collective landscape that has become the emotional vehicle for our personality.

Modern man is quick and easy to entrust his logic, value and wisdom into the hands of other people. We often succumb to the spell of marketing and social stereotypes that give us ready-made ideologies, solutions and prescriptions for everything. In this way, we allow ourselves to be easily manipulated into following accepted canons - of beauty, wisdom and health. From there, it is easy to fall into the pressure to get the best education, to get the most attractive appearance at the cost of sacrifices, or to fall back on symptomatic treatment instead of prevention.

A certain saying of the Vedic teachers - the rishis - is: "You are not in the world. The world is in you." If, then, the cradles of ancient civilisations marked the importance of man in a distinct way, why has trust in man himself diminished over the years in the face of other authorities? However, if someone told you today, that the answers to the most important questions were in your head, would you be willing to tune in to listen to them, or would you continue to follow ready-made schemes and voices from outside?

Lack of relationship with oneself

In eastern cultures and Buddhist traditions, the problem of lack of self-acceptance, lack of faith, self-criticism or internal conflicts with oneself are not as widespread, as the lamas emphasise. All these problems stem from a lack of relationship with oneself, which may be a result of technological development and the rush of Western civilisations. Some messages are also related to childhood images that have become embedded in our language, determining how we think about ourselves. We get to know ourselves most easily in crisis situations, when we make mistakes or things don't happen the way we want them to. This is when dialogues are formed in us, in which we can find themes of:

  • violence against ourselves;
  • blaming ourselves;
  • not tolerating our mistake;
  • feelings of guilt.

These and other voices lead us to the core of thinking about ourselves. They expose the frame in which our 'satisfaction' with ourselves led along the path of childhood trajectories is contained. If in childhood, for example, we had to satisfy someone else's expectations of ourselves by becoming a desired model of politeness, correctness or perfection, this self-image will grow into an inner critic.

Socio-cultural stereotypes

I was a seeker and still am, but I stopped asking the stars and books. I started listening to the wisdom of my own soul.

(Rumi)

We live in societies where we tend to solve problems symptomatically just as we symptomatically treat the body with drugs. The thinking of the ancient philosophers was based on a different strategy of action, namely, to find the fundamental causes that led to a problem. They thus used concepts and ideas that helped them outline socio-cultural problems. A similar perspective was preached by the Ayurvedic masters, who viewed the body and mind holistically, as a system of parts working together. So at what point did we begin to put our trust in external wisdom, seeking panaceas for all our ailments, frailties and problems from other 'experts' rather than seeking answers from ourselves?

In his conception of the psyche, Socrates assumed that man's paramount aim was to know his own soul and to care for it. Thus, he placed the human being himself at the centre of interest, and not external authorities or sacred deities.

Man's natural need is to provide himself with a sense of security. Over the centuries, man involuntarily began to shift his self-confidence towards deities as well as elders, seeking guidance. These processes have undergone minor modifications over the years, as communities, priests, elites, celebrities, journalists, experts or scientists have also been included in the circle of recognition. It is not really surprising that people look for support or mentoring on their path.

We need worthwhile masters in order to grow, of that there is no doubt. However, the processes of placing one's own perpetration the hands of random people, who only have a random "hearing" have led to a deformed sense of human worth. The lack of belief in one's own empowerment has led to the fact that, without external power, people often do not know how to organise themselves. It is easy to lose one's sense of identity in this way too. In fact, the key to all harmony is inner balance, built on self-work, intuition and feeling. This cannot happen without being in touch with oneself and building an inner relationship with one's own soul.

Body language and the language of love

Reaching for ready-made patterns is resembles to using templates in a tailor's workshop. Undoubtedly, it is easier to reach for a ready-made pattern than to design something oneself, but what if it is in our soul that the best solutions are found?

Following the language of your own soul does not mean ignoring the advice of others, but is a reminder to ground your own self in the decisions that you should be the author of. Restoring your own causality and responsibility is the same as giving yourself the power of creator of your own life. You cannot direct a film while running around the set dressed as a statistician and an actor. Seeking diagnosis and opinion in the eyes of others distances you from the process of building your own personal identity. The words of J. W. Goethe make clear the importance of trusting oneself:

As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.

(J. Wolfgang Goethe)

The primary contact with oneself is to draw from the personal map of one's own experiences. Finding in the body the records of its history in the form of, for example, tensions in particular places, teaches us body language. The soul tells us about itself sometimes precisely through the language of the body, which is a living record of our emotions. What has not been properly discharged or has been a burden for too long is deposited in the form of somatic problems.

A similar somatisation occurs in the mind, which, through various difficult experiences, creates records, constructing a certain narrative in the language of the soul. This narrative can be geared, for example, to a fear of love, or a fear of change when previous experiences have marked the records through failure. This is how the language of 'avoidance' is created, which is an escape from failure. We can also distinguish between languages of victimhood, languages of manipulation, or languages of compassion. All these languages determine the story of your self-care or lack of it.

There are also several non-verbal languages of love itself. For some, love is expressed in deeds by making surprises for each other, outings, or in the way of helping with household chores. It could also be preparing dinner, going to a restaurant or a concert. We can also distinguish a love language based on words, feelings and gestures. Each of these exponents thus accentuates different ways of dealing with love; one is all about atmosphere, sensivity and empathy, the next about tenderness. So what happens if people in a relationship communicate in different love languages and have different expectations of each other? The key issue is to find one's own soul language and the foundations on which it is based.

Finding the language of one's soul and the feelings that are its emotional expression is a lesson to be learned for Western civilisations. Faced with the opportunities we have, in the form of specialised jobs, development paths and diversity and competition, we have all the tools to develop our individuality. Can we use them to deeply understand and hear ourselves? In the face of the expansion of individuality, can we at the same time skilfully cooperate with other people? The only answer to these reflective questions is to turn one's attention to the art of communication with oneself.